What is "Trust the Whisper"?
In my book, The Hundred Story Home, and on this blog, you will hear me talk about “Trust the Whisper.” What exactly does that mean?
You can probably think of a time when you were trying to do something new or bold and you could hear a voice trying to stop you saying, “You can’t do that!” It might even be demanding, “Who do you think you are?”
That voice in your head is what psychologists and therapists will tell you is your inner critic. The one that knows all our flaws and weaknesses. It already knows all the ways we feel inferior so it reminds us when we are stepping outside the safe lines we have drawn for ourselves.
There are articles and books that will tell you we develop this voice in our childhoods when we or someone we know has a painful experience. At its best, this voice in our head wants to protect us from failing our hurting. But at its worst, it shames us into living small lives, afraid to take on new challenges.
The real problem with the voice in our head is that it tends to shout over the voice in our heart—the one I believe we should really be listening to. While the voice in our head tends to be negative, the voice in our heart is overwhelmingly positive. The voice in your heart will murmur, “Yes, this!” But it might be so soft a sound that you dismiss it for the loud, “No, you could fail!”
Learning to listen for the murmur above the shout is what I mean by Trust the Whisper.
That little voice encouraging you towards a person, place, job, or new experience, shimmering before you expectantly.
I’ve had big whispers like quitting my job to start something completely different, and tiny whispers like having coffee with a stranger. They both seemed unusual, yet each was exactly the right move. That career switch led me to a whole new life so much better than I could have ever planned. That stranger is now one of my best friends I never would have met and now can’t imagine not knowing.
When I first started listening to the voice in my heart over the voice in my head, I have to tell you I thought I might be crazy. I know some people bristle at that word and I have done a lot of work in the mental health space so I know why: “Crazy” can be used to marginalize and belittle people. But there is also not a word that people so clearly understand to mean “thoughts that scare you a little”. And when you Trust the Whisper, it can feel both crazy and scary.
I have found that the voice in my heart always asks me to risk something. Whether it is risking embarrassment that the stranger I ask for coffee doesn’t take me up on my offer or a bigger risk like the career switch not working out, there is a moment I have to decide: Do I take the leap of faith and listen?
My answer now is Yes. Always Yes to a voice in my heart. It’s like a muscle you can train to make you stronger and more powerful. Once you start listening and acting, it can be as reliable as a compass pointing you to your true north.
Because that whisper is just that—your life compass.
Those whispers from your heart are coming straight from your soul. They are telling you exactly what you need to do and who you need to meet to become exactly who you were born to be.
In this loud world, it can be difficult to hear and recognize your own whispers. While we each have decidedly different paths, our whispers have distinct similarities.
Whispers might be:
Uncomfortable; asking you to do something that feels outside your comfort zone.
Inconvenient; suggesting you start something at what feels like the wrong time in your life.
Unexpected; coming from a seemingly random place or surfacing as an odd idea you had no idea you wanted
Unqualified; suggesting you are capable of something you never imagined.
But here’s the quality that applies to all whispers: They are Insistent.
You either have to listen or pretend you never heard them.
Women | Faith & Story exists to help you listen. To Trust the Whisper. To give you faith and courage for whatever you are hearing. To give you a community of women who understand and cheer you on.
Together, we can listen, learn, and encourage each other to become exactly who we were always meant to be. Let’s silence the voice in our head and amplify the voice in our hearts.